I know this is actually just a bunch of drunk Josephs rather than a legit party, but again, I had the rant in my head immediately so let’s just move on. The BRO who sent this video in said it had a “Project X” feel about it. Dude, have you ever been to a house party with a bunch of moto BROs? This is like 9:30 pm shit. I mean, if you have ever been to a party where dirt bikes were present and at no point throughout the night did they get fired up, you were at a weak fucking house party. I don’t care where you are in the country, everyone plays it that way. It does not even have to be your bike – you see a CR250, you start it up and push the limit of that rev limiter for a minute or two. That’s the rule. As long as you are not pouring beer in the gas tank, no one can get mad at you. If they do – huge bitch, go make a sandwich.
P.S. The woman complaining about having her kids this weekend is so perfect. Like, that is the only thing getting in the way of her splurging the food stamps on cheap vodka, and she’ll probably still do it anyway. 4 year olds with a blood sugar deficiency mix the best martinis. Neglectful mothers and ’99 CR250s in the house go together like PB&J.
You know what I just realized is my favorite thing about GoPros? They allow a person to hear what they said in an instant like this. I always wonder if I actually yell “Holy shit” before a huge crash or if I simply just think it. Now I will be able to find out. Science.
The rest of the video is the most annoying thing that’s ever been on YouTube, so I’m just starting it at the only part that you need to see.
Is this a regular thing over there? Just jump into the canal for the kids? There is not a chance that this dude was actually going for it. None at all. Zero commitment and a completely limp-wristed twist of the throttle at the face were a dead giveaway of that. I mean, I guess I kind of get it. You are at Glamis with the BROs, a few beers go down, the gear comes on, someone is hitting the water. That’s just to be expected. I have to ask it – does jumping into the canal get this guy laid?
Let’s be real for a minute: kid’s execution was spot on. No mistakes, not even a single degree of hesitation. Just fluidity, poetry in motion. You might think that he is a joe for running no visor on that dinosaur of an HJC he is rocking, but you have to think like a competitor: in an event like this where every split second counts, cutting down on unnecessary weight and wind resistance can be the difference between hero and zero. Also, Spielberg-caliber editing for the win.