Pre-race: Your odds of winning this race if your name isn’t Eli Tomac are about 50:1. But I love a longshot; let’s just say if Tyler Evans ever wins an SX championship, I am going to be a very rich man.
Holeshot: Canada tried to get on the WOWBoyz program, but AMA was not having it. Jessy Nelson rips yet another holeshot. Perhaps they’ll actually give him this one.
Lap 1: Davalos mans up the inside and takes the lead from Nelson.
Lap 3: Savatgy was running third but it was basically a 4th, because the guy behind him was Tomac.
Lap 3 (cont’d): “Tomac has got to get by Seely first, Seely’s riding pretty good.” It was Jessy Nelson. Unless there is some huge conspiracy around Nelson and Seely that I missed the meeting about.
Lap 4: Canada black flagged for no-strapping it with the helmet. There should be a savage rule that if you are still running full pace and doing that, you get to continue because you clearly haven’t given a fuck since the Clinton administration.
Lap 5: Davalos is crushing it this moto but ask me again after lap 6.
Lap 7: Marteen is still winning. My world view is rocked.
Lap 8: Roczen hits turn 3 after the triple like he has his own gravitational pull. So fast.
Lap 8 (cont’d): Tomac into the lead. All the bookies just sighed in relief.
Lap 9: Roczen around Nelson, almost destroys both of them making the move but just gets to the inside. Kein fickt gegeben (pop that into Google Translate).
Lap 11: Tomac crosses the bars up coming out of the whoops. It is such a subtle move to say “I am better than you and your woman knows it.”
Lap 13: Roczen has chopped 7 seconds from Davalos into nothing, but after that heat race crash, Martin is probably medicated like a goddamn pharmacy.
Lap 14: Roczen slams Davalos in the see you next Tuesday turn, but loses more out of the deal than anyone.
Lap 15: Roczen passes Davalos around the outside in the turn after the whoops. If Martin even knew what planet he was on at this point, he would have punted Roczen clear into next week.
Finish: Tomac easy styles it home. I call sand-bagging. He’s way too fast for the pros. Read more