File Under: Put the ugly truck in reverse and run this slut over again. Yikes. You’re trying to tell me Vegas couldn’t produce a better fan of the week than this? I’m not even going to feel bad for what I’m about to do.
Hair: What kind of rat-tail design are you rocking? Dyke short on top. Rat-tail hanging in the back. This is like the slut version of the mullet. Bonus slut points for being platinum blonde; real original, bitch.
The Goods: Look at your cellulite ass walking around with just a bikini top like your shit don’t stink. Not acceptable. Don’t think I don’t see that lump of fat on your right arm, shit is gross, tone it up, would ya? Usually it works, but those big sunglasses aren’t hiding anything either.
Attire: Come on now, it’s 2012. Would it kill you to throw a little high fashion into your game? That raggy ass top is not flattering your saggy little meat pillows and from what I can tell, they’re your last hope.
Misc: Is that a wedding ring? Who would marry this bag of trash? Obviously not a pro cause she’s not rocking any passes. Also, piercings attract attention. If your belly button ring is pulling your fat down so much it almost makes it disappear, don’t pierce your belly button. Same goes for the lip, toots – if you have a busted-ass face, don’t put something shiny there to attract attention.
Final Rating: 1/ 2. Only cause there’s so many things I hate about you that I want to hate fuck you. Violently.
