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Why Did Nobody Tell Me About This Ami Houde Chick?

Someone sent this video over, explaining that this chick is some sort of Canadian WMA pro (is that what it’s called there?). Apparently she’s doing some web series bullshit, I don’t know. I really had no interest at all in this video. I was clicking links on the side of the page, which were also apparently made by this girl. They were pretty gay, for the most part, but let’s get down to brass tax here. The only reason I’m blogging this is because this girl is a certified dime. Like, 10s across the board. She absolutely crushes every other girl I’ve ever seen on a dirt bike (looks wise, not speed. Come on, she’s Canadian). No dirty looking makeup or inappropriately sized Fox tank top. From what I can tell, this is not a moto hoe. This is a moto “take home to dinner and secretly get high fives from your dad”. There’s another video titled “SoCalBROLife” that you should take it upon yourself to view for about 30 seconds. I’m not posting it because most of the video is painfully shitty. But for the first part, girl is rocking a bikini. Well done, Canada. I definitely thought Dean Wilson was the only good thing to come from Canadian motocross, but I am humbled by this chick. Ami with an “i”, shoot me a tweet sometime.

UPDATE: Since BROtocross cares on near UNICEF levels, I decided to grab a screen shot of the only part of the SoCal BRO Life video that anyone cares about. God bless you, Ami. And yes, I absolutely consider this to be A class blog content.

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Is This Video Going To Save 2-Stroke Motocross?

It’s over, good game everyone, but we have a winner. 2-strokes are officially back and this guy is driving the bandwagon. What Pulp Fiction did for John Travolta, this video is doing for 2-stroke MX. The title alone sends this video to the top of the list. But then you have the editing, the music, and the riding. Oh, the riding. One footed stalls on giant logs, one footers over the money booter, and absolutely no visor to speak of because it could block your line of sight should you decide that you are enough of a rugged maniac to do a backflip. Suffice it to say, my foundation is shook. I mean, I know goon riding and I know serious riding, and there is nothing goon about this. Dominant male #winning.

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Former Factory Rider Arrested Burglarizing Homes While "Searching For His Lost Dog"

PLATTEKILL — Two brothers are in jail after they used a lost dog story as a cover for a string of residential burglaries in the town, authorities said.

Town of Plattekill police  arrested Aaron Mills, 20, and Ryan Mills, 24, both of Plattekill, on Thursday. Aaron Mills was charged with five counts of burglary, a felony; Ryan Mills was charged with two counts.

Police said the two, working together, knocked on doors on a pretext of looking for their missing dog. If no one answered, the duo kicked in doors and stole jewelry and electronics, police said.

Their luck finally ran out when Aaron accidentally dropped a photo of Ryan, posing with the dog, at a home on Orchard Drive that they had burglarized. The homeowner turned the photo over to the investigating officer, who quickly identified Ryan, according to police.

Of course, the old “Have you seen my dog” routine. The Mills boys are really showing some initiative and ingenuity here, if I don’t say so myself. They came up with a whole back story, and even had the picture to go with it. The picture is so key. I’ll bet Ryan was all dolled up and the dog was just the most adorable thing you’ve ever seen.

Here’s where they fucked up: Don’t carry an actual goddamn picture, BRO. This is the 2010s, we are experiencing unparalleled technological breakthroughs on a daily basis and you’re carrying around a fucking Polaroid. That’s called a paper trail, and you’re better than that. iPhone dude. I’m sure you stole enough of them to snag one for yourself. Just throw the pic on there and boom, one less thing to worry about. You let your guard down for one second in this game and it will bite you clean on the ass like it’s your imaginary dog. Time to go back to doing shitty at Nationals, BRO. At least it doesn’t hurt your ass as much.

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Anstie v. Mayzee Rap Battle – Who’s Taking It?

Anstie. No question better than Mayzee. Not a doubt in my mind who would win in a rap battle. We have a ginger kid from England, and he’s absolutely slaying this track compared to what you put out, Mayzee. Anstie may lose the beat a couple of times, but he’s got that accent to give him a good foundation to run with.

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Spectator Gets Absolutely Eaten Alive By Bike.

In all seriousness, I kind of shit my pants a little when I saw that bike coming at me. If anyone has a 3-D TV, please get this video on there and invite me over. That has to be a total mind blower. I would definitely appreciate some audio, because that would completely add to the effect. Great video other than that, though. It really fucks with you on a psychological level. Who hasn’t played out a scenario like this in their head while standing on the side of the track? You know it could happen, but you just go ahead with your day, assuring yourself “It is extremely unlikely.” But now you see it, you now have a visual of what it would look like, and you can’t ignore it. This is the Jaws of moto crash videos. People will remember it. Tell me this isn’t exactly like what you just saw in that video?

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Quad Lovers Be Warned – You’re As Bad As They Are

DS164 sent this video over, saying I had to check it out. What really is there to say? First of all, we already know that I’m not into this game. Second of all, I fucking hate quads. Third of all, let’s make the second point the first point. This blog is quickly turning into 100% quad hate, and you know what? I’m ok with that. So when I’m seeing a happy-go-lucky quad video game video (a VGV, if you will), it’s really not having a calming effect on me. No, I will not have fun playing this game, and no, I will not give quads a break. If they wanted to be my friend, they wouldn’t be drifting corners and getting boners when the track is harder than their boners which they just got from the degree of the track’s hardness. And if you want to be their friend, you, sir, are my enemy. Back in the day, they hanged people for pulling stunts like that.

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Wilson and Millsaps #Winning At Freestone


I’m toying with a new feature here. Basically, something that happened at Freestone that if you did it and tweeted about it, you’d Charlie Sheen that shit. Pretty much the BROment of the Week, but Monster owns the rights to that for the Supercross series, as well as the word “Supercross”. Oops. We already know that Reedy and Rattray won at Freestone. But this wall jump was some psycho shit. You’d have to be one rugged maniac to play that game. Reed was doing it last year, but I guess he wasn’t vibing it in 2011. Then Millsaps comes out of nowhere to say “Oh, I would like 2-3 seconds a lap, please.” Dean-O follows suit, and there you have it. That is some #winning. Yeah, they didn’t actually win, but what has two thumbs and doesn’t give a fuck?

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Just Thought That I Had To Be At Southwick Soon

I usually hate when people quote rap like that to seem like they’re hard. But I’m Eazy, I get to do it. Today is the day. BROtocross is cruising up Southwick-way and hitting Stimilon and we’re hitting it hard. Bringing in all the guns. I’ve got a couple of the interns racing, so although you won’t be witness to Eazy’s prowess on a motorcycle, BROtocross will be represented on the track. And I’m sure you can count on some after-dark pitbike antics, because it just wouldn’t be Stimilon without that. So there’s a good chance you’ll see me getting down with the get down on a 110 if I can find one to steal. DILLIGAF? No. The time has come to throw safety to the wind and flip a giant middle finger in destiny’s face. It’s Stimilon time. I know I should have posted a heavy metal song, but that’s not so much my flavor.

All the Stimilon info is right here, BRO – http://stimilon.com/smc/index.php

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Does This Count As False Advertising?


More Motocross Videos

“I usually keep it on two wheels and win.” Sorry, BRO, but you don’t. And no one gives a fuck about the World Supercross Championship. That’s like rehashing that you won the AL East but lost in the playoffs. Race the nationals, BRO. Don’t be a little bitch about it.

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What Did We Think Of The Real World Moto Show?

Does anyone else get as pissed as I do when celebs get free MX shit? They literally have no idea what they’re looking at, but they get it, nonetheless. Don’t get me wrong, I totally understand why it happens. One Industries got so much screen time last night that they’re competing with Ryan Seacrest for airspace. Now the One brand is implanted in the mind of every mindless fuck who watches MTV. Crafty play, One. I wonder if they knew this was happening or if they just lucked into it with H&H being part of the show. Anyway, I watched that shit and cringed looking at the new gear on those stupid chicks and the gay porn guy and the fruity asshole crack baby. Yup, I watch the show. And let me tell you, I would kill it on that show. These people have no pizzazz. They just fight and fuck, that’s about it. I would be just straight firing off material, playing out a whole storyline for the cameras. You’ll see, I’m going to make an entry video and get in that shit.

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