Holeshot: It’s Mike Alessi. I don’t know if you guys heard, but he took out Tickle and should die, according to the Internet. The Internet is always right.
Lap 1: Villo got iced from 2nd to 5th in that one almost-lap. If I didn’t already know what happened in this race, I’d be excited.
Lap 2: Dude, James has got this one! 2nd place and only Alessi in front of him? Three in a row, bitch! JS7! JS7! JS…Annnnnd he’s down.
Lap 3: Watching the replay of James’ crash right now. You can almost see it. Dynamite coverage, FOX Sports. Just dynamite.
Lap 4: Alessi’s actually still leading. It’s lap 4 of 20. Baked.
Ralph Quote of the Race: “The last time Mike Alessi led a Monster Energy main event for the Supercross class of the 450s was…” Dude, did you just have a stroke?
Lap 5: Roczen grabs too much 450 out of the turn before the finish and Villo snags the spot.
Lap 6: Villo and Roczen around Alessi like he’s riding a lead frame coated in gravity enhancer. That’s a thing, right?
Lap 7: Dungey around Alessi. Shocker.
Lap 9: “Whoop pad”. I thought those days were behind us, Ralph. Whoop Section. It’s only one more syllable, boss.
Lap 10: I’m 90% sure that Alessi 100% let Hahn by. If not, he just took the most obviously-horrible outside line on the track, while running 4th in a fucking main event.
Lap 11: Brayton around Alessi, who has had by far the most coverage in this race, “dropping like a rock” as Fro put it.
Lap 15: Roczen gets by Villopoto is exactly the same way Villopoto got by Roczen, on the triple this time. It would have been Villo’s 3rd win, but he lost it on the triple. #Illuminati
Laps 16-20: Roczen leading. Poto all over him. Can Poto make the pass? Nope, Poto cannot make the pass. Checkers fly, and now it’s the weekend. Beer.